This is written by a field worker living abroad. Only names and places have been changed.
The Motorcycle Accident
A week ago, my friend Jack was thrown from his motorcycle traveling about 40 mph when a teenage girl pulled out into his lane from a side road. Motorcycle accidents are quite common here. They are the cause of many broken bones and bloody knees. And when the riders are not wearing helmets, the consequences are often fatal. Fortunately, Jack and his brother on the back were both wearing helmets at the time. Eventually, they were able to collect themselves, get back on the motorcycle and limp their way home with the brother driving. The girl on the other hand, who was not wearing a helmet, was taken to the hospital in the big city in serious condition.
The accident occurred about two hours away from Jack’s brother’s home. Because he was in no condition to ride his motorcycle back home, he decided to stay with his brother until he healed. When I stopped by Jack’s house a few days ago and learned from his wife what had happened, I offered to go to pick him up and bring him home. His wife seemed glad for that option, and, though I was having trouble contacting Jack himself, I decided I would go the next day to get him.
When we reached his brother’s house and I saw Jack, he seemed to be his typical friendly self, except for the frequent winces he gave as he cradled both hands. His right hand, in particular, looked swollen and out of sorts, and I suspected it was more than just a sprained wrist. He assured me that he had been going to see the local massage healer who was helping to get things back to normal. It is common knowledge here that joint sprains and broken bones are best treated by massage therapy. This is precisely why I wanted to go get him; I was quite certain that he would not receive the kind of medical treatment that he needed, whatever his condition was.
At the Hospital
I took Jack to get an X-ray at the hospital here. It was his first experience ever as a hospital patient. My hope was that if his wrist was broken, as I assumed it was, seeing the X-ray would be enough to convince him that daily massages were simply not going to straighten things out. Within an hour we had the X-ray and were headed to consult with a doctor.
After seeing the X-ray, the doctor quickly assessed the bone as broken and in need of surgery. She also clearly stated that no amount of pulling or massaging was going to reset the bone. When we got back to Jack’s home, I was optimistic that things were headed in the direction of surgery, though I knew that finances would be an issue.
Worldview Revealed
When we presented the X-ray to his wife and relayed the doctor’s advice, she just scoffed and said she would have none of it and what do these young doctors know anyway and besides, she knew of a man who was just about lame who was healed by massage therapy after the doctor had tried to perform surgery and it failed and …. You get the idea. I tried to explain the long-term consequences of forgoing surgery, but it was plain that I was getting nowhere. When she heard how much surgery would cost, she had all the more reason to reject that option. She admitted they did have the funds, but they were saving up to go on the pilgrimage to Mecca. It was at this point that I was finished with the discussion.
Jack’s wife has already been on the pilgrimage, so she has already “earned those points” so to speak. She is obviously operating based on a different set of priorities, and I wasn’t convinced that I was going to be able to persuade her. Although I left frustrated, I am still hopeful that Jack will eventually go through with the surgery: yes, hopefully, sooner than later. They know where I stand — in no uncertain terms — and that we are willing to help if money is an obstacle.
The Greater Need
We probably all face times when our efforts to be helpful are rejected by the ones we are trying to help. Although this situation with Jack seems pretty serious to me, there are greater issues of life, eternal ones, where the help that Jack needs is not yet a felt need.
Please ask that we would be masters of persuasion, able to highlight the deepest needs that our friends have, both by our lives and our words and then lead them to that Help. It is to this end that we continue to strive.
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